it's been a while since i have written for me. i tweet, i update my status messages, i key in fluff to kill some time, i key in words that i am told to. but i don't write.

words elude me now.

more so when i want them to reach out where i can't.

but silence is all i have to offer.

and it's filling in spaces, unhidden.

i think of things, of people. i have forgotten how to speak of them, how to speak to them. i try to remember how language felt. i keep forgetting.

i saw a creeper, rainsoaked, fat, glistening wildly, as if it's vulgarly celebrating life. i thought of you. then i thought about you. do you think of me, just so?

i have forgotten how to ask, i have forgotten how to tell.

when did i lose people to those small doses of words, visuals, bits of colours that flake off from their lives?

will language come back when i learn to talk again? will you talk? will you teach me how to?

i am losing language.
words elude me now.