i have misplaced/ lost/ let someone steal my passport, credit card, spare keys to my office in PA that i won't need anymore, my tax returns, my I-20 and my social security card. i think there is something very wrong with me. on some level, i know this is a big disaster, well mostly because upon hearing this, my friend stared at me in silence for 45 seconds before pronouncing "fuck" with seventeen syllables in it.

yet, i can't be bothered to get worked up about it. the worst it had done to me is provoke a deeply philosophical ( my kind of deep, which is like barely skimming the surface of the shallow end, holding the instructor's hand and clutching for life a life-jacket) question. if somebody steals my identity, can i go out and get a new one? i spent quite some time deciding on one and i am still not certain.

mostly i'd like one of those shiny, cool, sophisticated girl-woman kind of thing, with lots of inner balance, and a peaceful and tranquil core, propensity to like pastel shades and crystals and things of the sort. but i'd want the additional powers to shoot a mean one through the hoop and dance like pixies and eyeball a bartender over how a drink should be mixed. i'd also like my new identity to have gun or a biggish flick-knife and the ability to whip it out to totally crush deserving candidates into submission, without having to worry about the law and other tedious things like rights, wrongs dah dah da.

i can't help feeling a bit pleased about an identity theft.